When someone is acting differently around us, we often assume that we have done something to make them upset with us. Typically when we ask, we find out that they are hungry, tired, had a stressful day, or had a fight with someone.

Guess what? Almost nothing is about us! We’re just not that important. This might sound harsh, but you’ll find it is actually a relief!

If someone around you is upset, consider taking one of the following two approaches and save yourself a lot of stress and time spent worrying about other people’s problems:

1. Assume that it is not about you, because almost nothing is. Wait for the other party to speak their truth before you worry about it. If it is indeed about you, have a conversation.
2. Let them know, and let it go. We can always ask if something is wrong, but when we do, we absolutely have to believe what the other party says.

Karen Kindred Karen Kindred has over forty years of experience in individual and couples therapy. Karen is an interactive, solution-focused therapist. Her approach is to provide support and practical feedback to help clients effectively address personal life challenges. Karen recently retired and wants to share her therapeutic tools with as many people as possible. Karen holds a masters degree in social work and a bachelor’s degree in psychology from the University of Utah.